Catfight

Dunno why this reminded me of IMU cup.

2 Girls 1 Cup

*DANGER*: if you have not otherwise heard of the title, do NOT proceed. Or at least not immediately after lunch.



What is this, I don't even

Disgruntled

The bitch of an ex-housemate demands you move out over the weekend. It's Sunday, and she'll be back tomorrow. What do you do?

Enacted:

1) Walk on the carpeted floor with your shoes on, after having religiously refrained from doing so in the past.

2) Wash all clothes. Again.

3) Use up the remaining bandwith. Doesn't matter if its downloading PSN content or streaming dull and meaningless internet radio whilst out of the house. Say, for example, "This Week In Biotech".

4) Is it really garbage day? Oh well, another day won't hurt if it's already been there for 2 weeks.

5) Leave some pizza for the lovely ex-housemate. Half eaten, strewn on the table. Best served cold.


Further recommendations:

a) Turn the thermostat on the freezer up just a tiny bit. (eg 0^o to 1^o shouldn't hurt)

b) Change the settings on the TV (brightness max, contrast min, autosearch ALL channels)

c) Turn off the water source to the toilet. Flush the toilet. Then USE it. Attempt to flush toilet again, shrug at imminent failure, and walk away. Allow to simmer for a few days.

d) Loosen a few lightbulbs out of the ceiling lights.

e) If any piece of ex-housemate clothing happen to be lying about, be a sweetie and throw it in the dryer for her. 5 hours should do the trick.

f) Since you can't use the toilet anymore, pee on the carpet, in an inconspicuous corner.

g) Brace for lawsuit

Woah

Time to buy a new computer.

Dramedy

Call History:

DO NOT ANSWER

DO NOT ANSWER

DO NOT ANSWER

DO NOT ANSWER

DO NOT ANSWER

I do

Do you ever strum your guitar hero guitar to a real song?






Do you ever miss cannulas so many times you feel like stabbing yourself in the spleen with one?









x2





Do you ever wake up in the morning wondering whether the money is worth getting out of bed for?




I do.

Every fucking day.

Revenge Of The Cliche

State of Origin

The term, when used in isolation, usually refers to rugby league football or Australian Rules matches, in which players are selected for the Australian states or territories where they either first played (hence the name 'state of origin') or played the majority of their junior football. The concept mirrors international representative rules in other sports.

Nurse 1: Who are you going for? Blues (NSW) or maroons (QLD)?
Nurse 2: Blues
Physio: Blues of course!
Nurse 3: I'm gonna have so much champagne tonight, I'll be color blind!
Reg: Why would I sit down and watch sweaty men hug each other?
Me: (I'm going for Optimus Prime..)

State of origin?

Screw that. I wanna watch transformers.

---

And I did.

But the ending, like veggies, felt like it had to be force-fed to me.

Having said that, it did do what it was supposed to do. Senseless mechanical violence interspersed with moments of witty comedic relief.

And just when you might be getting a teeny-weeny lil bit bored of the cycle, Megan Fox happens.



Gotta love the way they ride. And I'm not talking about the bike.